Table,Walls & The Secret Garden!

Hey people!

I haven’t posted in awhile so wanted to update you all!!

I hope that you all had a wonderful Valentines Day! Those who follow me probably already have guessed that I worked for the weekend.

I made a collage to show you how my table is going!

I’ve painted it again, so now the black doesn’t show as much.

It is still in the eye though. I’m trying to work out how I am going to fix that.

Please feel free to contact me privately or leave a message here telling me if you have any ideas.

Truthfully, I was excited about fixing up my studio because I thought that it might bring some of my art friends together!

Like many I also wanted to use it as a way of helping my family.

I thought that renovating my studio would be renovating a part of their house.

The more I thought about it, the more that grew. I wanted to help more and more people.

I knew being known would be the only way of helping so many.

I do not have the dream of being a star mainly for myself anymore.

I can NOT say that I didn’t want that to a degree when I was younger though.

I can say that I was in and out of treatments, etc. and although beauty was found in theatre I had little to no confidence offstage.

When in theatre or any artform I had loads though and would have gladly posed for nude art.

There is absolutely nothing sexual in nude art but natural beauty.

It is hard to explain but I was not myself when I was on a stage and in theatre.

I didn’t have to deal with the bad things in my life and just thought of the musical lines, etc. that I had at the time.

I know some from theatre and some from visual arts, etc. I would just LOVE to see them all working together.

Mark Montano and Sandy McTier did give me ideas about the other room.

Thanks for that!

I actually have another idea that I have been working on.

This collage that I made for you all shows it.

My idea first started years ago with the doors.

My friend Violette Clark painted her cottage and that gave me the idea to paint my studio! Thanks for that Violette!!

I made a bunch of sketches at that time based on musicals.

Some were of the Secret Garden but I never put the two and two together.

Years later I had a HUGE thing about Flower Beauty!

To read more about Flower Beauty go to: https://www.flowerbeauty.com/pages/our-story

Everyone knows how much I love Drew Barrymore and if ya don’t ya do now! That inspired me to paint flowers on my doors.

That and the meaning that flowers hold to me. A flower is like life to me and each petal a different stage of life. When you feed it and water it, just like a person it grows.

I made a piece for my friend Jennifer Doubleday years ago based on just that.

Please do not think that I always create with the meaning in mind.

Like many, sometimes I just create to create and the meaning comes later. Sometimes just days, other time months or years, sometimes those meanings never come. I’m guessing that they are simply created for me to release whatever may be going on in life at the moment.

Back to my studio!

I think flowers are perfect for my doors so when they are all closed it’s a wonderful place for meditation and relaxation.

I also believe it’s very important to see and know that strong females can make a huge difference in the world.

I strive to be one and am inspired by every female I have ever mentioned, seen, etc.

I do not just say that. I truly am inspired by your strength! Thank you for sharing that strength with the world.

I’m going to be refreshing what I learned in B School this year and can’t wait.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I moved to that topic.

Well, because Marie suggested to find a few things that you want to complete in 2020 instead of having a billion projects going at once.

I don’t know about you but I tend to have so many projects going that I can’t think straight.

I leave a few projects unfinished when that happens though.

I usually get back to them but it makes life harder and more complicated.

This time I’m mainly working on my studio walls and table.

Everyone has bad days and one of the things that helps me on mine is art.

I’m trying to move on and not dwell in my past.

Musicals made today help me there, along with many movies, etc. it all helps me.

Like Marie says

Everything is Figureoutable!

Thank you for that.

I hope that you are not offended, etc. if you remind me of someone I worked with. It does not mean that I am not able to realize who I have worked with and who I haven’t.

It simply means that I love and respect you as a person.

It does not mean that I am in some secret relationship that would make a great story either. Let me answer any questions there, it means I absolutely LOVE my art family but as friends and nothing more.

I do not believe that all forms of love have to do with sex in anyway. I also do not believe that is wrong.

I love and am thankful for any and all art friends who I have been blessed to have in my life.

I do hope you see that as a good thing because my friends that is not going to change.

I am not paid to say this and I know some will wonder there but like Taylor sings I’ll just shake it off if anyone feels differently, etc.

One of my favorite musicals was the Secret Garden.

As a teen my father had the role of Archibald Craven who was Colin Craven’s father.

If you know the story, you know that Colin was a sick little boy. I’d watch my father singing to Colin on-stage and it’d be extremely hard to stay in character because I’d imagine it was me. I can remember struggling NOT to cry. I was very ill as a teen and could hugely relate to Colin’s character. At the same time, I did not like crying in front of others.

Still, I was on that stage!

I am very proud of my younger self but also absolutely know that was years ago.

This is today and I deserve to live for today. Everyone does!

I’m not as ill today and realize how strong I had to be. To be honest, I simply don’t know how I did it.

I know that you do what you have to do. Today I know without theatre there is NO possible way that I could have survived. I just would not have had the emotional strength.

There is the Scientific help but in reality without the emotional strength needed that alone would not have saved me.

It’s just like any relationship. You need both the emotions and facts noted or it just simply will not work.

Today I believe that emotional strength would have come naturally if I was not so ill.

I am alot like my father but I do have my mother in me as well.

When I was younger if I were able to think clearer, I would have known that it was ok for me to be me. I was open about my being bi-sexual but was confused about it too because when I would talk to some (not everyone) about it they would assume that I was trying to be like my sister.

Emotional strength is one thing that I truly hope updating my studio like this will give me.

I still struggle each day just not as much as when I was younger.

I realize how many years were stolen from me. When I think about that fact my heart breaks.

There are only two things that bring my heart back to life.

Theatre and knowing that there are others like me and worse.

Some would disagree with me, I’m sure but I also don’t think it was a bad thing at all for me to be in theatre.

I believe it made me strong and who I am today!

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to every single person who has had anything to do with art.

Locally and internationally you help me everyday!

Also thank you to my parents for introducing me to theatre!

Do not get me wrong! I am NOT begging for ANYONES attention. It IS however my trying to LIVE and my friends, I will try to live as long as I can nomatter what.

Think what you will, you can take me or leave me as the musical Rent sings.

What I want to do is add photos of my art friends to my studio.

All to remind me everyday of the good in life.

I am so thankful for each and every one of them! Seeing some of them each day would bring a huge smile to my face.

This would be after I finish my walls, etc. of course but what do you all think?

Please either leave me a message, let me know in a comment here or message me privately.

I’d love to hear your thoughts!

I have to note that any contest, etc.created has brought me joy in seeing that others care. Thank you for them!

They also help me learn about people, etc. for future projects.

I am thankful for you beyond words and for the joy you bring into my life.



You can write me at: angela@angelasartarea.com

Most importantly be kind!

Namaste

Angela